The First Time...

The first time I saw you... the first time I held you... the first time I brought you close to me... was the the greatest moment of my life. It was a very surreal moment... very surreal for first 6 months really. It's an awkward moment. A difficult moment. A person goes from being virtually free from many responsibilities to having to be a very responsible person. A lot of my personal life, the extra luxuries, were given up... but I wouldn't change it for the world.

There are multiple opportunities that you will come across in your life. Some you will excel in... other's you will fail. That's a facet of life that you will have to embrace because there is no getting around it. However, you only have one chance with a child to do it right. There are no second chances and the last thing I would ever want is to fail at being a father. You break it you buy it... there are no returns. LOL

Of course, that wouldn't be an option. But I do want you to know that you have changed my life tremendously. I've accomplished so much since the both of you have been born... and I really owe a lot of it to you and your mother. My own mother has done a lot for me and she is my greatest mentor... but life got serious once I had my first child.

You may not understand this right now, when you're reading this, at this moment. But when you have your children of your own, I hope you'll be able to finally comprehend what I'm talking about. There is nothing in this world that I would rather have... than the two of you in my life. I enjoy your company, our laughs, our going out, play dates, soccer and basketball games, playing video games.... our talks... I just love you period and life would not be the same without you.  -Dad

I Will Always Love You

I know that there will be times that I get very angry with you over things that you have done or mistakes that you have made. And your first reaction will be that I hate hate or that I dislike you or something close to that... all of which is the furthest from the truth. My job as a father is raise you and instill ethics, morals and values that can make you a  healthy member in society. You will make mistakes, we both know that. You will not be perfect and no one is infallible. If the the mistake is severe I can't ignore it and pretend that it didn't happen. These are teachable moments for you and my role as a father is to find some way to teach you through that moment.

These moment's may be tense and you may become angry and hurt by the things I say. But what is most important is that I am angry because you are my child and I have high expectations of you. If I didn't love you I wouldn't are what you do as long as it doesn't affect me or my lively hood. However, since you are my child, every action, whether positive or negative, is a direct reflection on me and your mother.

You may not understand what I am saying now and it may take you a while to understand what I am saying. It may be a long time before you fully understand what I am saying. I just want you to know that we have many day ahead of us where we may get upset at each other, but that is not born out of hatred. Despite whatever challenges that we have as a family, no matter how angry we get at each other.... on thing will always remain constant... you are my children and I will always love you.

Friends...

Humans are social creatures and for the most part seek the companionship of others. You too will be seeking the companionship of others. Some of these friends will be good choices and others not so much. Some will be very good to you and other will hurt you deeply. I won't always be there to help you manage your friendships, nor will you want me to.

I see a lot of myself in you. Both of you are so caring and wanting to please. You are willing to go beyond your friends expectations to show that you are a good friend. However, relationships are not only built on trust, but it's also reciprocal. Your friends should want to do for you as much as you do for them. Being helpful is a good thing, but not so much that people will take advantage of your kindness. Sometimes they will want to see how far they can take your compassion for them and use it to get what they want.

Over the course of your lives, you will make many friends. I hope that you will make more good friends than bad. But no doubt there will come a time when you meet someone and they are really not a confidant. There is nothing like the feeling of someone who you thought you could trust, that betrays you and makes you feel like your friendship isn't valuable. That pain can be very gut wrenching and difficult to bear. At times this may be almost embarrassing, because people who care for you warned you that the friend didn't have good intentions, but despite the warnings, you chose to try and see past their faults. You may not know who to turn to and you may not be even be able to trust your own thoughts. It is in this time of need that I hope you can find me.

These are the times I hope you can seek my advice. Allow me to be your friend when you are in need, allow me to be your father. I will not be able to get rid of your pain, but I will listen and try to give you the best advice as I can.

When in doubt and the friendship seems far from repair... Stop reading the last chapter so you can move on to the next one....

My Children

Although I started this blog in 2007, this is my first actual post I've ever made. Therefore, I am new to blogging despite having this page for 5 years. I was actually surprised when I opened up Blogger and discovered that I still had this account despite never using it. I assumed that with 5 years of inactivity that this blog would have disappeared. I've been telling my friends that I've been thinking about starting a blog and I'm really pleased that I found this page gathering dust in the blogger matrix.

There are several reasons as to why I decided to start this blog.... but the primary reason is for the two children you see in this picture of this blog. I have an uncle, whom I've never met, that was recently murdered in the Philippines. Then just this past Friday, December 14, 2012 a 20 year old gunman entered Sandy Hook Elementary school killing 20 children, 6 adults and himself and he had shot his mother earlier in the day. These tragedies certainly have me questioning my own mortality and have been a cause for reflection. If I were to leave this earth tomorrow, what legacy of me will my children have? How will they remember me? When they think about me... what will they remember? 

This blog, I hope, will be the beginning of an electronic record of my thoughts, teachings and parental guidance for them to have. We are all one step away from death, that much I do know. Of course for the majority of us, it is uncertain when that time shall come. My desire as a father is to leave a tangible piece of me behind for my children to grasp on to, should I ever leave this earth without ample time to talk to them.

Therefore, this blog will be a collection of my introspection's on life, my photographs and other media pieces I have created. Although this blog is dedicated to my children, I am also publishing this so that I can share this with the world....